Saturday, August 18, 2012

Plan B

I have always been a planner. I love calendars and to do lists, and although spontaneity can be fun, I like the big events in my life to be planned to a T. This must be something that God wants me to work on. In fact, I often hear him telling me that He has a plan and that I am not always in charge. I first heard him loud and clear when we decided we were ready to add to our little family of two. My plan was easy. We would try once or twice, get pregnant (a boy first, a girl second), move into a cute house in our new town of Greenville and welcome our baby into that home a few short months after we had been settled. I had it in my head that I had to be a mom before I was thirty. Well, my thirtieth birthday came and went and I did not have a baby to hold or even one growing inside. That is when I realized that God had other plans. Our baby (or babies) were not ready yet and so we would have to wait. The best lesson I have learned through the waiting we have endured (and trust me we have waited on quite a few things i.e. Jobs, houses etc.), is that God always has a plan and His plan is ALWAYS better than the one I have written neatly in my calendar.

And so here we are today. I am laying in a hospital bed, hooked up to four bags of medicines, covered in monitors for contractions and little baby heart beats. Enduring shots that literally sting like a bee and medicine that makes me feel like I am downtown Columbia, SC in the middle of July (that was the hottest and most miserable (j/k) place I could think of). This was not in my planner. Right now, I am supposed to be preparing for the first day with students on Monday. The babies are supposed to come anytime after 36 weeks and I am not even 34 weeks until Monday. To say that I shed a few years when I went to the doctor Thursday and my contractions were a minute a part, would be an understatement. Again, this was not my plan. In fact, I still had a few last minute things I was going to get done this weekend. Well, as always God stepped in with his bigger and better plan. Over the last two days, I have gone from a nervous wreck to someone who has tossed her planner out the window and placed her babies arrival in God's hands. This transition is due greatly to my wonderful husband who has been able to remain, or at least seem, calm the entire time. My change of heart is also due to the unbelievable outpouring of love, support, and prayers that we have received from our family and friends. We are so very blessed to have such an amazing support system.

Now it is just a waiting game. Something else I have never been that great at, but I am confident that Ashton and Mary Seegars will make their debut when God intends them to, and if that means a little early well I will just have to change my plans.

The medicine I have to take to stop the labor makes me feel like I am burning from the inside out.
I have the air as low as it can go in my room which is why mom and Kim look like they are visiting in December rather than January :)

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